Filed under: oscar race on!
Oscar hangovers are never fun..
The 81st. Annual Academy Awards came and went like a prom night massacre on peyote.
Hosted by Hugh Jackman, the ceremony was the swiftest it had been in years. Mr. Jackman had two major song and dance numbers. One at the show’s open that was loosely inspired by the art of Michel Gondry and accompanied by Anne Hathaway (Someone put that girl in a musical! Who knew she had such a nice voice!), and the other in the middle of the show accompanied by Beyoncé that was quite gaudy and staged by Baz Luhrmann (Someone please slip that man some ritalin, pronto!)
All the winners were as perdicted by most oscar pundits with good ole’ SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE (2008, Danny Boyle) picking up a whopping 8 statuettes out of it’s 10 nominations.
The only parts of the show that really dragged were when the acting categories were up. Instead of having the previous year’s winner present the award to the opposite sex, this year’s producers of the ceremony, Bill Condon and Laurence Mark offered up a twist: Five previous oscar winners would come out and give each nominee a verbal handjob before announcing the winner.
As precious as some of the deliveries were, it halted the pace of the show with a resounding thud. Besides, how awesome would it have been to see Penélope Cruz slip Javier Bardem the tongue as he slips her the Best Supporting Actress Oscar..
So now, it’s back to square one of a new cinematic year as awards pundits and the losing nominees stumble the walk of shame in the morning light..
So til next time,
end of line..
